I have been awed to tears by the displays of support for legal marriage equality this week. Similarly, I have been humbled by reading the carefully-worded beliefs of those whose interpretation of scripture and lived experience tell them otherwise. Some have written that they hate the sin and love the sinner; that they speak their truths through lenses of love; that one does not have to agree with another’s sinful lifestyle to love and support them as people. All fair. Now I want to add my perspective on the matter while the dialogue is hot and speak my truth about living not in sin, but in love.
I knew before I even met Kathryn Kendrick in person that I had met the one. I was right. Over the last two years, we’ve built a life on a strong foundation of love, faith, and covenant.
Our relationship is in no way defined by immorality, but by the covenant of love that we have made to one another and is blessed by our families, friends, and faith communities.
When my mother was diagnosed with ovarian cancer last month, Kathryn was there both as my partner and as a family member. At Kathryn’s grandfather’s funeral yesterday, I stood with the family the same as any other “in-law.” We pay bills together. We pray together. We love the other’s families, and they love us. We share an address and closet space, which obviously means we know how to compromise. We try to pass off the dog-walking responsibilities to the other on cold mornings. We argue about normal things, like whether or not to buy the more expensive cereal with the fancy granola clusters over the corn flakes. We cry at sentimental commercials. We love long dinners with friends. I am passionate about college football, Kathryn isn’t. Kathryn can make beautiful art out of anything, I appreciate it. We celebrate small victories. We run out of toilet paper. We dance in our dining room. We stand in awe of the majesty of God’s world and do our best everyday to walk hand-in-hand through life with a spirit of peace, reverence, and joy for the beauty of it all.
We live in love.
This is our “lifestyle.”
No vote or law or scripture will change the love and joy that we share in our life together, but it sure would be nice to have some of those 1,138 federal benefits and to know that at the end of this life, whenever that is, I can sit with Kathryn, hand-in-hand, and know that we lived in love, legally.
I knew before I even met Kathryn Kendrick in person that I had met the one. I was right. Over the last two years, we’ve built a life on a strong foundation of love, faith, and covenant.
Our relationship is in no way defined by immorality, but by the covenant of love that we have made to one another and is blessed by our families, friends, and faith communities.
When my mother was diagnosed with ovarian cancer last month, Kathryn was there both as my partner and as a family member. At Kathryn’s grandfather’s funeral yesterday, I stood with the family the same as any other “in-law.” We pay bills together. We pray together. We love the other’s families, and they love us. We share an address and closet space, which obviously means we know how to compromise. We try to pass off the dog-walking responsibilities to the other on cold mornings. We argue about normal things, like whether or not to buy the more expensive cereal with the fancy granola clusters over the corn flakes. We cry at sentimental commercials. We love long dinners with friends. I am passionate about college football, Kathryn isn’t. Kathryn can make beautiful art out of anything, I appreciate it. We celebrate small victories. We run out of toilet paper. We dance in our dining room. We stand in awe of the majesty of God’s world and do our best everyday to walk hand-in-hand through life with a spirit of peace, reverence, and joy for the beauty of it all.
We live in love.
This is our “lifestyle.”
No vote or law or scripture will change the love and joy that we share in our life together, but it sure would be nice to have some of those 1,138 federal benefits and to know that at the end of this life, whenever that is, I can sit with Kathryn, hand-in-hand, and know that we lived in love, legally.
eloquent...beautiful...I admit to being jealous of you two...but damn, there's no excuse for running out of toilet paper!
ReplyDeleteThanks Eva for sharing your life and your love with all of us. You and Kathryn are two of my role models and share the kind of love and relationship that we all strive for and long for. Blessings my friends
ReplyDeleteEva, I love you and Kathryn so much. I look up to both of you in so many ways, and I am so proud to call you both some of the best friends and mentors I could ever ask for. I honestly don't know what I would do without you two. "If the days aren't easy and the nights are rough, when they ask you what you're thinking of: Say love. Say for me, love." - The Avett Brothers
ReplyDeleteTo the moon and back.
Kathryn, you have found yourself and incredible woman here. She is as eloquent as she is beautiful. I was able to learn about you, your life and your dreams while we were in college together but, I have to say, that in all the visual beauty I saw in your art, I hear in her spirit. Truly a perfect match.
ReplyDeleteI love this very much!
ReplyDeleteMost people live a lifetime without knowing this depth of love. I read the last half of your essay through tears. I love you and Kathryn as high as the sky and as deep as the ocean.
ReplyDeleteMoved to tears. So thankful for you, Kathryn and the blessing you are to my family. When Sara Reed grows up and asks "what does it mean to love someone," I'm going to read her this. Over. And over. And over again.
ReplyDeleteeva, just came across this via. facebook. thanks for sharing. beautiful. i'm glad to see you so happy! ghp 2004 :)
ReplyDeleteYes!!! You rock, Eva!
ReplyDeleteThe two of you have been on my mind so much these past few weeks - Eva's mom, anniversary, Kathryn's grandfather and DOMA. Now here in the middle of the night you both find a way to touch me so deeply. The future is in good hands. Love you both.
ReplyDeleteEva, thank you for that beautiful thought. You have the gift to put into words the way I totally feel. God bless you and Kathryn!
ReplyDeletewow! this is beautiful....
ReplyDelete